through the picture window
a skeleton-like parking structure blocked most of outside
above the car warehouse in a margin of window-- a crystal-cloudless-
blue sky
capped a hospital wing—lot of windows with drapes drawn
against the sun--
patient rooms or offices who knows?
perhaps a parallel waiting room with people heading the
other direction?
fifty-or so souls filled the chairs against walls and in the
rows in-between
first people to
arrive, sat closest to the desk, families, friends, talked
and children, bored with Fox looked at the sunlight squirmed
in their chairs
wanting to be free running outside spreading their wings soaring
through the small trees
new birds learning their song, learning to fly
a few patients gazed out at the trees, just now giving birth to early buds
or gazed, really, into their inner world—their sanctuary
private, no families or friends, no Fox, only others with
the same song sitting silently, lost inside
but cat-like ears tuned to the poly-phonemic tones in their
name waiting for the signal to return
names spoken meant appointment or lab, perhaps answers to
fear bound questions
busy waiting room, usual Tuesday morning
regulars know without asking whether you are kidney or liver
newcomers endlessly think the question, “kidney or liver?” when they look at others
mostly they are kidneys, first time attendees
the old-timers glance at them quickly returning to their
solitude or family
the newest arrivals constantly look around, avoiding eye contact
wives, girlfriends, mothers, talking incessantly the room
hums
a million unseen bees fill the otherwise silent void
a name is called too softly to lift passed the bees wing
sounds
no one moves, but everyone looks, until the name is called
again
loud enough this time for two to get up—same first name—and
blush
trying to be polite in their personal nervousness their too
soon end-of-life inner thoughts
both arrive at the counter and one returns looking at the
floor
desperate for news they don't understand, “ Dr. How long do
I have ?”
the answer comes in bio-chemistry-speak, labs, tests, results,
shots, pills and kindness
the sun moves across the sky making the windows mirrors
obscuring the building across the way
the waiting room empties slowly, when a name the soul moves,
livers go left, kidneys go right
relief at the decision, action, movement, threads of
birdsong from long ago
lift
leaden arms, moving leaden legs
